Thursday, July 4, 2013


For the Fourth of July I’m giving you…a new entry from The Daily Bestiary!  The first one in two whole weeks!  (Spoiler alert: So not worth the wait.)

Kidding!  Seriously, I’m glad to be back.  More on that in a bit; right now, let’s talk about the schir.

Schirs are fantastic goat-demons from the Bestiary 3.  If you haven’t given them a look, check them out.  At CR 4, they’re a fabulous first demon for parties to encounter.  Picture this: The party members have taken up arms to defend their families’ homesteads, and risen quickly in levels ever since.  They’ve warded off attacks by rabid animals and isolated gnoll raiders, and finally taken the fight to the humanoids’ lair themselves.  But when they get there, they find a new player involved—a goat-headed creature of spite wielding a diseased halberd, capable of summoning more of its fellows, and very hard to corner.  It’s an outsider—a demon.  More is going on here than the party members expected, and their world will never be the same. 

Also, schirs are spite demons—creatures of base malevolence and envy, who committed crimes in life “for the sole purpose of petty retribution,” as the Bestiary 3 notes.  Schirs are great allies for recurring NPCs and regular thorns in the party’s side.  And if one escapes (likely via expeditious retreat), rest assured it will be back—it literally can’t not return and still exist.  It must strike back.

One final note: While I personally am not a huge Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup role-player—“You got your Warhammer in my Pathfinder!” “You got your Pathfinder in my Warhammer!”—for those of you who are, schirs are practically required for anyone trying to create a Beastman or Skaven army in Pathfinder or D&D 3.5.  Throw them together with evil satyrs, minotaurs, and dretches (or ratfolk, fiendish ratfolk, and dretches) and you’re good to go.

A violent storm rages—no natural blow, but the expression of an evil storm deity’s displeasure after being thwarted by the Maiden of the Moon.  Where the eldritch lightning strikes, the trees split, emitting wild schirs who search for servants of the benevolent goddess to slay.

An adventuring party slays a local monster of legend, humiliating the son of a neighboring lord who has been claiming that he himself vanquished the beast.  Now a laughingstock, the young man is easily tempted when a cowl-wearing cultist promises him revenge.  All he has to do is smash a rotten-looking gourd in the presence of the party.  The lordling chooses market day, not knowing he is about to release a pack of schirs into the heart of his father’s town for nothing but his own spite.

Priests of Harmon, Duke of Peace, expel a cabal of demon worshippers from their hideout in a clock tower.  In a fit of pique, the remaining cultists summon schirs to defile Harmon’s temple.  The demons arcane lock the doors and begin spreading their pox all over the structure.  Heroes will be needed to break into the temple, cleanse the contagion, and rescue the priests inside.

Pathfinder Bestiary 3 74

Hi all!  It’s good to be back.  Really, really sorry to have been away for so long.  As part of my vacation and to thank you for your patience, my plan was actually to try to keep you entertained with reposts of some of my role-playing-related Reddit comments/reviews, while meanwhile I caught up in replying to some of you guys’ amazing emails. 

But when I got to where I was staying, I discovered the place a) in shambles thanks to a much-delayed renovation, and b) no Internet.  By the time I had reliable Internet access, it was…never.  I never had reliable Internet access.  Ever.  So I had to give up. 

But I’m back in action now, so expect lots of posts and (hopefully) more reliable correspondence from me.  I’m happy to report I’m thrilled to be cracking open the Bestiaries once again, and thanks for sticking with me while I was gone.  There’s lots of fun ahead.


  1. I assume that you are aware that Paizo has announced Bestiary 4? And it looks like a GOOD ONE (not that they haven't all been good).

    I'm happy to see that you'll have plenty more material to mine for this blog.

    1. Amusingly, what originally led me to read this blog was Patch's jest in the announcement thread that Paizo was trying to kill him. It does look like a fantastic one though, the more Lovecraftian horrors we can throw at PCs, the better.