How appropriate that on a day we unwrap mysterious boxes of
all sizes, our monster is a treasure chest filled with teeth...
I’m a fan of all of Paizo’s Revisited books, but Dungeon
Denizens Revisited is definitely worth an extra look because of how seriously
it takes some of the typical but typically weird monsters that stock your
average dungeon. Clinton Boomer’s
take on the biology/psychology of mimics (as insane creatures convinced they
will evolve into humans) is definitely worth a read (as is his list of variant
abilities for tweaking yours).
And that’s the thing about mimics—with Int 10 and the
ability to speak Common, they may have loads outlandish (or revelatory) things
to say…if you can stop one from eating you long enough to talk to it. Of course, when your bed or your
rowboat sprouts a fanged mouth, conversation is probably not the first thing on
your mind.
Caught in the middle
of a religious war between the Revivalists and the Cerulean Heart, a sprawling
citadel has changed hands several times; each side sits firmly entrenched in a
wing as they duel over the keep’s heart.
Each cohort also believes the other is ignorant of the secret door
hidden in the bookshelf in the library, sending agents through the tunnels to
sabotage and spy on the enemy. But
some of these agents don’t return—the secret door is actually a mimic lured
from the dungeon by the constant fighting, who allows the spies to go through
but gobbles them up on their return trip.
A clutch of chokers
stole several children, intent on devouring them, only to be driven off by an
unlikely protector: a mimic fascinated by these “people dolls.” Squirreling them away in its lair, it
seeks to talk to them and amuse them by changing shapes. But if adventurers do not intervene,
eventually it will grow tired of this and demand the children demonstrate how
they grow into real people…or it will “take their doll bodies apart” to find
out. Meanwhile, the chokers still
hunger for their lost repast...
On most worlds,
sages suspect aboleths or ropers created mimics. On Nimmelheim, the gnomes tell a different story. When Garen Highmount proposed a prank
contest for all the gnome deities and demigods, Jaxen of the Jet Pommel offered
a jewelry box that tried to bite anyone who opened it. The wound it gave Garen nearly cost the
god his finger, and was deemed in such poor taste by the assembled host that
Jaxen was shunned for a year. The
box was hurled into the depths, where it spawned the first mimics. Since then, Nimmelheim mimics have held
a particular hatred for gnomes.
Jaxen, meanwhile, would go on to suffer the Seven Shunnings, eventually
warping into the acid-oozing, protoplasmic demon lord the Delver, the adversary
of the entire gnome pantheon.
—Pathfinder Bestiary
205
Thanks to some rather…evocative
mimic miniatures my GM had (featuring some particularly tentacular pseudopods),
mimics in our campaign came to be known as “rape boxes.” *facepalm*
Sigh—I was coming up too close on the midnight deadline to
pull together my radio show post last night. But if you’re not sick of Christmas yet, here’s Saturday’s
radio show—a New Indie Christmas
edition of The New Indie Canon. It’s two hours
of new and classic holiday music, including Calexico, Best Coast, Guster, Rufus
Wainwright, and more. Download it and enjoy the merry!
(Music starts just shy of the
four-minute mark in the file. If the feed skips, let load in Firefox or Chrome,
Save As an mp3, and enjoy in iTunes. Link Good until Friday, 12/28, at
midnight.)
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